A Future Complex

Hello,

I'm going to open this with reference to the previous post, stating that the blog will be "on indefinite hold" - or something like that. Well, scrap that. The life of blogging has allured me once more and, hey, why shouldn't I give it another crack?

(Why? You have nothing interesting to say? Nobody cares anyway? Hey, you, shut up.)

Like always, I've had a few things on my mind recently, but my largest revelation is that I have a Future Complex. By which I mean to say, like those who have superiority complexes are obsessed with their own superiority, I am obsessed with my future. At the age of 11, I knew unchangeably what continent I would live in when I was older. This hasn't changed. Though I've always been inclined towards it, by 13/14 I knew that writing would have to be a part of my profession. By 15, I had already chosen 2 potential universities that I wanted to go to. Now, at 16, I've decided more exactly what area of the aforementioned continent I want to live on.

However, none of this worries me. Imagining, thinking, dreaming - they're all parts of me that I don't wish to banish any time soon. (Though sometimes those qualities are unfortunate - say, when you're a pensive pre-teen who continuously thinks about what happens after death and scares himself into almost-sleepless nights.) However, I do wonder if I take it too far when - being only 16 - I think of what I want to do when I'm old and grey and have retired. I've been thinking about where I'll live, what I'll do to pass the time, whether I'll have the fortune of being able, actually, to continue my job (as I doubt it will be labour intensive).

I've just about managed to stop myself from thinking too thoroughly about what happens after we die, and now I'm on old age? I do have issues. All the same, these attributes are me and I quite like my mental time-travelling journeys. I think it has much to do with my age - the typical Bildungsroman age, finding yourself, etc. - but I can't wait till the future. What will it be like? Can I live up to my imagination? I hope so. I'm not too quixotic.

That's my return to blogging, though. Now to go and do some outstanding things that affect my present, like: watch 90210 and then finish The Diary of Anne Frank so I can get started on Will Grayson, Will Grayson by David Levithan & my favourite author.